Sold! ... what a mix of emotions!

This month I have sold 2 of Ali's larger pieces of medical equipment on Ebay.  The first was her feeding pump and the second was her apnea monitor.  Both were expensive pieces of equipment, and it really didnt make sense to leave them lying around here just taking up space.  After trying to sell them through craigslist and several special needs groups without any responses, I finally decided to auction them on Ebay instead.

The feeding pump was something I used constantly for her: daily, often times continuously.  It was a little hard for me to sell it, but it was actually harder for Al just knowing we didn't need it anymore.  I expected it would be the opposite.  I was the one who primarily fed her.  I expected I would struggle when it came time to get rid of it, but instead it really didn't affect me emotionally.  A medical supply company bought the machine.  We actually made a profit selling it for more than I originally paid for it, and I was thankful for God's provision once again.

Then I put her apnea monitor up for sale.  The apnea monitor was something we used nightly for months when she was a baby, but she hadn't even used it for well over a year.  I didn't expect this sale to bother me at all.  I was contacted by one potential buyer about it, and even spoke with him on the phone.  His 6 day old firstborn child was fighting reflux and her O2 sats were dropping. They currently had a apnea monitor, but were waiting to hear from the doctor on how long she would need it.  It was a pleasant conversation, and I was excited to be able to help someone else in need.  I was honestly sorry and disappointed he didn't end up winning the auction.  I was preparing to package up this apnea monitor when it hit me; I suddenly felt slightly overwhelmed.  I was getting rid of it ALL.  I still have some of the smaller medical supplies, but all Ali's big stuff is going.  It is sad she isn't here to need them anymore.  At the same time, I am thankful she has no use for them in heaven!

God knows I love a good deal though, and I think he used that to help lighten the pain of getting rid of these machines.  We made a significant profit of both machines.  It also came at a time when the money was certainly an extra blessing.  We had to put 4 new tires on the van last week.  The sale of the apnea monitor alone covered that expense.  What a blessing!